So how does a man like David handle the conflicting pressures of his different responsibilities?
Sadly, kings like David have an impossible balancing act to achieve. They must apportion their limited available time in the best way possible for the good of their kingdom. And what is the best balance anyway?
How do the needs of a
king’s subjects – millions of people – weigh against the needs of his family? Ignoring his family will make it more likely that his successor will do a bad job. Prioritising the education of a successor seems vital, but is unlikely to appear urgent. I can’t speak for David, but I can’t help thinking that in his situation, I would look after the urgent matters of the kingdom, putting off training my replacement until I had more time. And that time would simply never come,
because the demands of successfully ruling millions of people will always supply an unending parade of urgent matters! So which is better, to help millions today, or to provide personalised non-urgent training to a son?
Unfortunately, kings and other leaders always seem to get caught in this trap.
Jesus is often described as the son of David and will sit on the throne of his father David. David was a great king who left an
unmatched national legacy, but his family was a mess, particularly after his sin with Bathsheba.
David had absolute power and could choose his own priorities. As with many kings before and since, one of his priorities was taking wives and concubines. The Bible gives us the names of eight wives[1] and mentions at least 10 concubines.[2] He may well have had more of each.
In the beginning, however, when God created one
man, he created one woman also. The practice of taking more than one wife did not appear for several generations after creation.[3]
While we don’t read of any problems between David’s wives or concubines, there are several other family conflicts described.
For David, an emotional and musical worship of God was central to life. This is shown clearly in the Psalms, at least half of which were composed by David. It was
also shown when he danced in public before God as the ark was brought into Jerusalem. This seems to have been no problem with God or the people, but David’s wife Michal, princess-daughter of Saul, considered it uncouth for a king to behave like that and told him so in no uncertain terms. David retorted that the common people would be pleased with his behaviour. The episode concludes with the sober reflection that Michal had no children for the rest of her life.
Some time later, the disastrous incident with Bathsheba brought God’s punishment on David and his family. After this, David’s greater and more painful problems began:
- David’s oldest son, Amnon, raped his half-sister Tamar. David did nothing.
- Two years later, when David’s third son, Absalom – a full brother of Tamar – saw that nothing was being done to punish Amnon, he killed his half-brother and fled to his grandfather, the king of Geshur.
David was very upset, but did nothing.
- After three years and some prompting, David invited Absalom to return from exile, but refused to see him.
- After another two years, Absalom tried to reconcile with David, but was only partially successful, which prompted him to embark on a plan to subvert the nation. After some years, he was ready to rebel against his father.
- Absalom’s forces approached Jerusalem, prompting David to flee, leaving the palace in the
care of ten concubines. On the advice of Ahithophel, who was probably Bethsheba’s grandfather, Absalom set up a tent on the roof of the palace and had sex with his father’s concubines.
- When Absalom’s forces were ready for battle, David’s nephew Joab led David’s army to victory and killed Absalom (who was also his cousin). David was very upset with Joab because of this.
- Another rebellion began almost immediately and David commanded another of his nephews, Amasa (who
had led Absalom’s army), to gather an army, but he failed to do so by the appointed time. David then sent Joab’s brother Abishai to lead his trusted troops and put down the rebellion. Joab went with Abishai and soon killed Amasa, took control of the army, and defeated the rebels. Once again, David was unhappy with Joab’s behaviour, but took very little action.
- When David was very old, David’s fourth son, Adonijah, tried to make himself king, although he probably knew
that David had already promised that Solomon, a son of Bathsheba, would succeed him as king. David made sure that Solomon was crowned king, but did nothing else about Adonijah.
Looking at this long list of family problems, the consistent feature throughout is that David took very little positive action. After his sin with Bathsheba, David appears to have lost his confidence and moral authority. Perhaps he would have felt it hypocritical, or
possibly God’s statement that he would have problems in his family left him unwilling to fight for the family he wanted. Perhaps he felt that would have been fighting against God. He still led by a godly example, but the commanding leadership was missing.
Conclusion
David was a great king and a wonderful example to all of his subjects – except in the matter of Uriah and Bathsheba.[4] However, after that
failure, his leadership was only a shadow of what it had been.
As David relaxed late one afternoon, a sudden temptation changed the course of his kingship and mortally wounded his family. How quickly we can lose our moral direction if we are not eternally vigilant!
Take care.
Notes
[1] His first wife was Michal the daughter of King Saul (1 Samuel 18:27) while 2
Samuel 3:2-5 and 1 Chronicles 3:1-4 list Ahinoam, Abigail, Maacah, Haggith, Abital and Eglah. Bathsheba became his wife in 2 Samuel 11:26-27.
[2] When king David’s son Absalom rebelled against his father, David fled Jerusalem, leaving 10 concubines to care for the palace (see 2 Samuel 15:16; 16:21-22; 20:3).
[3] Jesus observes that the breaking up of marriages through divorce was the same – see Matthew 19:3-12 and Mark 10:2-12.
[4] 1 Kings 15:5
