I wonder how soon I will die?  God told me some time ago that I would not die until I had seen his Christ, and today, I saw him.  So now I know that there is nothing stopping me dying, and I am amazed how much it has changed how I feel.  Knowing that I wouldn’t die until one special thing had happened has meant that I have never thought much about death, despite my age.  Now I am thinking about death quite a lot, but I am filled with a peace and happiness which I could never have imagined.

What I saw was a complete surprise.  Just imagine, if you can, seeing the great king as a baby – not much over a month old!  Utterly helpless.  Still not talking or walking.  He doesn’t even smile much yet, but he does look at you.  I don’t know if I was imagining it, but I don’t think so – those eyes are something special.

A little baby – when I had expected a grown man, ready to be anointed and to rule as king.  It’s funny really, but I had just jumped to that conclusion, although God had never said it would be so.  I still can’t get over my silly misunderstanding, nor can I get used to the idea of a cute little baby as the Messiah!  It makes me laugh to think about it.  I’m a little disappointed though that it delays the time when he will be king.  A little baby can’t be a king.  A little baby can’t be a great prophet like Moses.  A little baby can’t lead his people to victory.  So, for now, we’ll all have to wait, and I suppose I will have to get used to the idea of dying soon, joining all of those others who are sleeping in the dust, waiting.

It started out as just an ordinary day in Jerusalem, and I had no plans to go to the temple at all.  I got up early, as I always do, and prayed to God as usual.  And that was when the day started to feel a little different.

During my prayer, I started to feel a sort of suppressed excitement, as if something wonderful was going to happen, but I couldn’t think why.  Of course, I have long had this hope that I would see the Messiah, and so he has always been in my prayers.  Ever since God made me know that I would see the Messiah, I have tried to make sure that I prayed about this every day.  Often, I have asked God for today to be the day, and sometimes I have asked several times per day.  I had no good reason to think that the Messiah was more likely to be seen first on a feast day, but I have always felt that it seemed appropriate somehow, and so it was normally on feast days that I concentrated on my prayers for the coming of the Messiah.  But this day was not a feast day.  It was not a Sabbath.  It was no special day at all, except for this feeling that it was special.  So I prayed about the Messiah, but there was no lightning or thunder, no angel promising a day of miracles, just a thrill that went through me and left me even more excited than before.

My prayer was over and the day was just ambling along as any normal day does when I thought again about the Messiah, and suddenly the idea came into my mind that I should go to the temple to see… well, I wasn’t quite sure what I might see, but I did know that I should go!  Immediately.

Quickly, I made sure that I had everything I needed to visit the temple and set off.  Not knowing how long I would need to stay for, I took an extra cloak with me as it was quite a cold day.

I was approaching the steps leading up into the temple when the strange things started to happen.  My path had led me to a wider road, and as I joined it, I found myself beside a young couple who also seemed to be heading towards the temple.  As an old man, they greeted me respectfully, and I saw that the young woman was carrying a sleeping baby, so I asked them whether they were going to the temple.

“Yes,” the man replied, “it is the end of the time of purification after my wife gave birth[1].”  He was carrying a basket which must have contained the birds for the offering: the offering of those who were too poor to afford a lamb[2].

“Have you travelled far?” I asked.

“Not very far,” he told me.  “Just from Bethlehem.”

“Bethlehem in the land of Judah,” I responded quickly; “the city of David?”  My heart started to beat a little faster, but I couldn’t tell why.

“Yes, I am descended from David, so I had to be in Bethlehem for the census.”

My heart continued its errant behaviour.  Maybe this young man was the Messiah!  Maybe that was the reason for my feeling of urgency in coming to the temple.  How could I find out?  I decided that openness was the best policy.  “What is your name?”

“Joseph.”

“Are you the Messiah?” I asked urgently.

He looked at me with wonder, then looked at his wife and smiled.  Together they looked at me and together they said, “No.”  Again, they shared a smile.

“Oh,” I said, disappointed.  But then I began to wonder.  Maybe this young man was the Messiah after all, but did not know it.  “Are you sure that you could not be the Messiah?”  I asked, doubtfully.

Once again, the look between the two of them before he answered, speaking the words very deliberately, “Yes.  I am certain.”

“How?”

By this time we were walking slowly up the steps leading into the temple courts, and we were surrounded by quite a crowd of people.  Now I was not the only one whose heart was beating faster, and my own heart seemed to jump a little with what I saw.  The baby was stirring with the change in his mother’s movements, and for the first time I looked at him a little more closely.  He was not a particularly attractive looking baby, but there was no need to tell them that.  So why was my heart pumping so hard?  What was the cause of the excitement I felt?  I found myself wondering what David had looked like as a child.  Even a king starts life as a baby.

We reached the top of the steps and the vast courts of the temple were spread out before us, with the holiest buildings dominating the central area.  Our temple is a place of exquisite beauty – fitting as a house of prayer for the living God.  My companions were obviously not as familiar with the temple as I was, and were looking around uncertainly.

“Is there a place where Mary – my wife – could sit for a while to attend to the baby, and make sure that he is clean and ready to be presented before God?

“Yes, follow me,” I said, and led them to one of the many walled areas that surround the temple courts within the vast colonnaded area.  After that, I left them to themselves, pleased that presenting their baby to God was so important to them, but hoping that I would see them again to pursue an answer to my question.

I went to the gate which leads into the courts of the temple where only Jews can go and settled myself down to watch the crowds and wonder why God had moved me to come to his temple today.  I thought about the couple and their little baby, and mused over Joseph’s categoric statement that he was not the Messiah.  How could he be so sure?  The looks and smiles he had shared with his wife Mary had me puzzled.  I could not divine the hidden meaning, and whichever way I twisted the problem it still remained insoluble.

After almost half an hour, I saw the couple approaching.  The time had been used not only to prepare the child but also to prepare themselves, and the whole little family looked neat and tidy, happy together, eager to make the offerings to God.  For a woman, the time after the birth of a child is an extended time of purifying during which she is forbidden from worshipping within the congregation and limited in many other ways.  I wondered how long this couple had been married – their eagerness seemed more like that of a couple about to be married than one whose marriage had been blessed with offspring.

I think it was at that instant that the possibility first consciously entered my mind.  Could this child be the Messiah?  I was not even sure why the question occurred to me, but the excitement it inspired must have shown through, even in my old, bearded face.  Before the couple could approach the gate to tell the priest what they had come for, I accosted Joseph.

“Is this child the Messiah?” I asked, breathlessly, and even as I asked, I knew the answer with the certainty that comes from God.

“Yes,” he answered simply.

“Tell me how you know,” I begged, and he told me the details: the visits from angels, the dreams, the visiting shepherds, the name given for the child, their early marriage.

“A virgin shall conceive and bear a son…” I murmured, suddenly seeing a connection I had never understood before, and it wasn’t hard to imagine the difficulties that would arise from that situation!  “Emanuel – God with us.  Jesus – God saves.”

I quickly explained to Joseph and Mary what God had promised me: meeting the Messiah.  This little boy was the fulfilment of so many of God’s promises, including the one he had made to me.  Gently I reached out and took the precious bundle from his mother’s arms, then I spoke the words God stirred within me:

“Lord, now you are letting your servant depart in peace,
according to your word;
for my eyes have seen your salvation
that you have prepared in the presence of all peoples,
a light for revelation to the Gentiles,
and for glory to your people Israel.”

Joseph and Mary looked amazed at what I said – and very pleased.  It was clear from what Joseph had said that they had found the visit of the shepherds helpful, and I expect that they will find that my story can help their faith too.  Although I can’t say that I know them well, their faith seems very strong – and they will need that strength.  I am still struggling to understand just how important this child is.  This must be the most important birth since creation!  And God let me live to see it.

I said to Mary: “This child is appointed for the fall and rising of many in Israel, and for a sign that is opposed.  Yes, a sword will pierce through your own soul also, so that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed.”

How old must Jesus be before he can become king and bring about the consolation of Israel?  No more Herods, no more Caesars, no more Roman armies dominating God’s people.

How long, O Lord?

I must go and tell my neighbour about what happened today…

[1] Leviticus 12:2-4
[2] Leviticus 12:6-8